


I Can See No Way

by Eternal_Love_Song



Series: Regrets Collect [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Complicated Relationships, Introspection, Multi, Mutual Pining, POV Loki (Marvel), Relationship Study, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-30
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-09-30 16:13:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17227226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eternal_Love_Song/pseuds/Eternal_Love_Song
Summary: There were too many options that ended unfavorably to Loki, enough that Loki really should be keeping his mouth shut, and yet he couldn't help his... concern for the two that had so graciously accepted and allowed his presence. An acceptance that he was very aware could be rescinded at any moment. An allowance that was unspoken and tenuous at the best of times.





	I Can See No Way

"Do you really think that this is wise?" Loki questioned. He kept his eyes firmly on his book, refusing to look at the mortal that had so easily talked him into his last mistake.

Loki needed to not look at him, to remain as unaware as possible to what effect his words would have. Would he take them as a rejection? Would he come to his senses and leave Loki behind? There were too many options that ended unfavorably to Loki, enough that Loki really should be keeping his mouth shut, and yet he couldn't help his... concern for the two that had so graciously accepted and allowed his presence. An acceptance that he was very aware could be rescinded at any moment. An allowance that was unspoken and tenuous at the best of times.

Loki kept his fingers coiled tightly around the edges of his book, pouring his focus into restricting his movements, his finger twitches, his thoughts, so that nothing would betray him here.

"Pepper was the one to bring it up," Tony told him. Loki could not help that his eyes snapped up then, surprise overriding his self control. Tony was smiling, hand rubbing the back of his neck, happy and confused and... guilty? Perhaps? Loki bit his lip. "I was surprised, but we made sure that she enjoyed it, so..."

"I see." Loki closed his book without bothering to check the page. "Once more then." He closed his eyes. There was a particular mindset he needed if he were to repeat the performance of last time. Loki wasn't certain if he had the strength to participate in this... display, whatever it was a display of, again. Knew that he didn't have the strength to refuse. Would never have the strength to refuse such an offer to be so tantalizingly close to what he wants.

Tony placed his hand on the back on Loki's chair, instead of his shoulder. They didn't touch often. Loki didn't touch at all when he could help it, had learned long ago not to touch what was not his. Tony's restraint, a restraint that Loki sometimes didn't think the man had, was the only reason that Loki knew his heart was not misplaced. Tony took what he wanted with near carelessness, but not Loki. He had seen Tony insert himself into spaces where he wasn't wanted often enough that he could easily tell when the other man was holding himself back from doing so.

Loki wished he wouldn't, understood why he did. It would be all too easy to... slip, if they were given the opportunity.

"If you don't want to..." Tony's voice was soft, not quite a whisper, but he was leaning into Loki like a promise of what Loki could have another taste of tonight.

"This is a dangerous game, Stark." He opened his eyes to look directly into Tony's.

Tony laughed, the sound slightly hollow, slightly bitter. "Who's playing?"

Who indeed. Loki found it hard to believe there were three players but no game. And yet, what else was he to think? Tony had no game, his motives were as clear as day. He wanted to appease his lady love and, if possible, have Loki lingering by his side. Or perhaps it was only Loki who hoped that would be the eventual outcome. That Loki would be allowed to stay close enough to orbit.

And what did the Lady Pepper want? This could not possibly be some elaborate scheme to humiliate Loki. He may not have played his cards close enough last time, so it was possible that she knew of his desire, but he couldn't see any way for her to turn that against him in this way. And was she not guaranteed more pleasure than any of them? No, there was no way for her to turn this around on him when she had freely offered it. So maybe it was no more or less than what was being offered, simply another joint venture in bed.

And yet...

And yet.

Three players, no game... It was certainly too good to be true.

"Come on." Tony reached for his hand, smiling as he laced their fingers and tugged Loki from his seat. "We shouldn't keep Pepper waiting."

 _Will she be waiting?_ Loki wanted to ask. _Is it not too early? Too soon?_ He did not let his hesitation show. He went when Tony tugged, allowed his fingers to curl around the other man's for a few brief seconds, followed where he was led.

Loki tugged his hand from Tony's before they got too close to the room. Tony smiled at him sadly, feeling the loss and hiding it by shoving his hands deep in his pockets.

The lady Pepper was waiting for them on the bed. Loki hesitated on the threshold, didn't take a single step further until she acknowledged him, beckoned him in, and then he came to her side as requested.

They didn't speak, much as they hadn't spoken last time. They disrobed without haste, hesitated to touch each other, and turned their attention to the lady instead. Tony kissed her and Loki the opportunity to steal a few greedy touches of his skin, to press a few secret kisses to his back, his neck, before dutifully moving to the Lady Pepper to attend her pleasure. They had only stroked and kissed her for a few moments before she broke free of them both. "I want to watch," she said as she moved back. "You two first."

Loki was wrong. There was a way for her to humiliate him after all. He froze, eyes wide, unwilling to turn to Tony and unable to look away from her. He wasn't certain that he could, had ever been able to, fully hide his reactions and feelings for Tony, but he hadn't wanted to make a display of them. Not... not like this. He wasn't willing to be mocked by her, to see her wave her victory flag before him so cruelly. He hadn't thought that she was... that she would... But then again, was it not her right to hoard her claim?

Could Loki really turn this offer away, even if Tony was priced with his own pride? It seemed far more cruel than he had imagined her to be.

Three players, Loki reminded himself, one victor. That is how games were played, after all.

Tony looked at Pepper with equal surprise, but none of the shadow that plagued Loki's thoughts. He laughed, brought her close, showed her with soft, slow kisses. "What kind of mood are you trying to set, Pep? Trying to give him stage fright?"

Loki only then spared a thought to what he must have looked like. He closed off his expression, pushed aside his darker thoughts, composed himself. He was a prince. Just because he had no power here didn't mean he had to act like it. If humiliating him was her game, he could still bear it with dignity. Clench his fist, grit his teeth, and move forward.

"It would be a shame to neglect you, Lady Pepper," he said with a purr, moving closer. There was some surprise there, but enough lust to be capitalized on. Loki used it. He had long been praised for his clever fingers, clever tongue, and he put them to use on her until she was falling apart. He left Tony to do the intimate work of kisses, soft touches, cradling her as she fell apart in his arms.

Tony caught his face in his hands at some point and kissed him until his facade broke. Until he was no longer trying to conquer, only to savor. As if he could memorize the taste of Tony's lips, the feel of Tony's skin, the sound of Tony's moans, from this one encounter alone.

"Let's do it," Tony whispered.

Loki pulled back with confusion at first, then alarm. Tony didn't let him recoil too far.

"It's okay." Tony pressed his forehead to Loki's. "It's for us," he said softly.

Loki nodded slowly, keeping his hands on Tony even as he pulled away. Tony turned to Pepper, who was panting still even as she watched them closely, and nodded. She reached into the nightstand, retrieving a small bottle that she used to coat her finger and began to open Tony up.

Loki wanted to be doing that, couldn't take his eyes away from where her fingers disappeared in and out of Tony. Loki couldn't stand being idle, let his hands roam over both of them. He caressed thighs, fondled Pepper's breast, tweaked Tony's nipples, and all three of them were panting by the time Pepper deemed Tony ready. She took the bottle again and coated up Loki, making his shiver as her hand stroked him.

She moved behind him, kissing Loki's shoulder, and whispered, "Go slowly."

Loki was glad that she was behind him, where it would be harder to see his face. He couldn't say no to this. Didn't think he could pretend to want it any less than he did. He met Tony's eyes and slowly sank into him.

The world stopped being about the three of them.

Pepper was still there, at the edge of his mind, touching Loki, kissing him, watching them both, but Loki could no longer care. All that mattered to him was Tony tight around him, Tony's voice in his ear, Tony's hands on his back. Pepper was an afterthought at best. Loki couldn't be bothered to care when he was getting everything that he wanted.

They kissed as he came. Pepper inserted herself between them to slid herself on top of Tony and rode him to completion.

Loki didn't have it in him to resent her.

He rose and returned with a cloth to clean them up. Pepper pulled him into the middle of the bed before the question of whether or not he should stay had the chance to truly arise. She settled herself at his back, leaving him free to hold onto Tony.

They didn't sleep.

Tony was occupied watching Loki, studying him, tracing his hands over every place he could reach moving too much. Pepper wet his back with tears. Loki didn't know what to do with that, decided to do nothing, and the night passed with them pretending and knowing that no one was asleep.

It was morning by the time Tony actually found sleep and Pepper had to rise for work. Loki watched her closely, wondering if they would talk about her tears, not knowing what there was to say. It wasn't until she was dressed that she looked at him with eyes red from lost sleep and tears. "Take care of him for me?"

Loki didn't ask if she meant for today or forever. His answer was the same either way and he didn't want to hope for either option. Loki couldn't afford to hope. Even if there was a crack that he could slip into, it would be putting his hopes against Tony's own. Loki couldn't... Loki didn't want to do that. 

He nodded.

She smile at him, sad but steady. She moved to his side and pressed a kiss to Loki's head, surprising him. "Thank you, Loki."

Loki didn't know what to think as she left the room. There were three players and Loki was starting to feel as if they were all playing a losing game.


End file.
